What I've Learned: The First 45 Days

1. I didn't need to worry so much about how everything would get done without Jake being home...we're actually managing quite well. The dishes get done, the laundry gets folded (although probably not put away), the bills still get paid, and Asher and I usually have dinner and get bathed with enough time to have a couple of bedtime stories every night. In fact, there is actually a lot less to do without one more person to pick up after (*ahem*)!

2. I'm a lot better at being a single parent than I thought I would be....and that makes me glad that I'm able to do it, but sad that I have to. There is no substitute for the best partner, lover, husband, and friend, and certainly no substitute for this little boy's daddy whom he adores.

3. Asher knows something is up...still not sure what...but he knows. Lots of waking up at night, lots of wanting to sleep in our bed, etc. The saddest thing I noticed one day was when I hadn't made our bed yet and the covers were sort of lumpy on Jake's side. Asher said, "Daddy!" and went over to the bed. When he touched the bed, he could tell there was no Daddy under the covers, and his face just fell. That will rip your heart out.

4. I have the BEST friends possible. The ones who have taken one thing I've merely mentioned in passing & run with it...from invites to dinner, or an offer to clean our gutters, or even to vacuuming out my car...that is the stuff that I cannot thank you enough for. Perhaps it's "no big deal" to them or something that's easy to do, but it's huge in my book and it means so much. THANK YOU.

5. I have the BEST family imaginable. Whether I need a break, a favor, or they just want their "Asher fix," I've been able to depend on them from the beginning with the smallest of things to the big emergencies. Lawn mowing, taking Asher for the night, or just listening to me blubber and cry...I appreciate it all more than I can adequately express or "pay back." THANK YOU.
~Emily