Back in the saddle...

Well, again, it has been a while since I posted! A lot has happened since the last posting, so in the interest of keeping everyones attention I am going to break down a few things over a few different posts.

Today's post is going to focus on surviving R&R leave and coming back. As all of you know I traveled home for R&R starting the 27th of January. After several "show up and wait" calls, we finally left Bagram in the very early hours of January 28th. From there I traveled through Kuwait and finally ended up in Atlanta. When I got to Atlanta on the 30th, I had a bit of a lay over. In the interest of not putting all the information about what we do and where we go between Afghanistan and US soil, if you have questions, you can always ask me over a bottle or big glass of beer! :)

Once I got into Atlanta, however, I had quite a layover. Well, I had packed for such an occasion and was able to clean my self up appropriately - fresh uniform, socks, t-shirt, shave and brush my teeth...I almost felt human again!! Anyway, the flight from Atlanta to Moline was packed, but not terrible. I had the fortunate instance of sitting next to a man that had wrestled at University of Iowa around the same time I was there competing in Tae Kwon Do...so we had a little bit of a common background to start a conversation and talked about family, being in the military, his civilian career, etc. It was nice.

Once we got into Moline, many of you have seen the pictures from my wonderful wife's perspective...it was awesome from mine as well! As soon as I got off the plane I made a bee-line for a side area where I could put my computer back into my carry-on bag and walked as fast as I could towards the hallway that leads to the main welcoming area...I had been on missions that had produced less butterflies in my stomach than that walk! As soon as I cleared the corner leading to the hallway where the welcoming area was, I saw everyone standing there...and my wife holding my son (who really wanted to get down and play with his balloons!). When I saw them, I started running down the hallway...before anyone saw me! When I was a little ways away, Em finally got Asher lined up with me and we saw each other...and it was a.w.e.s.o.m.e. The feeling knowing that my family was right there was amazing and lifted so many burdens from my shoulders in that split instance...and even though my little man had grown so big, he felt light as a feather as I picked him up.

The rest of the two weeks was amazing, as has been chronicled by Em (and there will be more posts extolling the adventures of leave!) so well. It is amazing what just a little bit of a break can do to restore your mind, body, spirit and faith.

Since returning I have been busy...been on mission, been trying to get back into the groove of what had happened and what was happening, getting my head "back in the game".

One of the strangest things about being deployed is the concept of time and reality. What I mean is that when you deploy, you are so focused on what you are doing, what the next day holds and what needs to happen right now that you loose some focus on what is going on back in the "real" world. There is a trap that many people fall into - it is the trap thinking that when we leave our lives stop and everyone in our life stops as well...the reality is that no matter what (and this is a phrase I have said to Emily - and many soldiers going through a rough patch - many times) you do or what happens, you can never stop time. The sun rises and sets regardless of where you are and regardless of what you are doing...

When I returned home, things felt a little bit the same, but were very different. My son was bigger, my doggy had white whiskers under her chin, my wife was much more independent...things were very different. My son didn't want/need me to do anything for the few days - he needed his momma. Sadie returned to my arms quickly, but she was a little unsure why I had been gone for so long. Em ran the house - her word was law and that's what needed to happen, because that is how it had been since I had left.

Now, don't get me wrong, within a few days, things felt very much normal and back to the "proper order of things"...daddy helped little man with breakfast, Em and I got to relax and just enjoy each other's company...and I got to enjoy the fruits of my wife's labor of re-filling my refrigerator in my Man Cave!! All in all, the two weeks I spent at home were exactly what I needed and when I needed it.

Returning here, in the same way, I had expected to be able to roll right back into the same roles I had played when I left. That was not to be - at least not right away. Before I had left, I was the go to man for a lot of things that needed to be done from different people. Well, like with home, when I left other people got tagged with getting the jobs done. They did a great job and I had expected no less, but when you return and go to do something that you had normally taken care of only to find out it was already done, it makes you feel a little different...especially when the task is completed, but not completed the same way you would have done it (wink, wink Babe!! :) ).

Coming back from leave has been interesting...there have been some things that have happened that I am not happy about, things that make me excited and then other things that hang in the future that should be pretty interesting. Regardless of what happens in the near future, I have the light at the end of the tunnel starting to shine and I am back in the saddle...ready to finish this ride.

~Jake